Friday, September 11, 2009

The 2009 NFL Preview!

Finally, the 2009 NFL Season is upon us. Join us, won't you, as we fearlessly attempt to forecast the season, secure in the knowledge that several significant injuries/suspensions will completely screw the crap out of these meticulously prepared choices.

In the interest of accuracy, we broke it down by taking the complete schedule, and going game-by-game, predicting who would be the winner. The won-lost records were than compiled, the standings updated, and the rest is history. Check it out:

NY Giants 13-3
Philadelphia 13-3
Dallas 10-6
Washington 9-7

Chicago 13-3
Green Bay 12-4
Minnesota 8-8
Detroit 2-14

New Orleans 12-4
Atlanta 9-7
Carolina 8-8
Tampa Bay 1-15

Arizona 8-8
Seattle 7-9
San Francisco 5-11
St. Louis 3-13

New England 12-4
NY Jets 8-8
Buffalo 4-12
Miami 4-12

Pittsburgh 14-2
Baltimore 12-4
Cincinnati 6-10
Cleveland 2-14

Indianapolis 12-4
Houston 11-5
Tennessee 9-7
Jacksonville 3-13

San Diego 13-3
Kansas City 7-9
Denver 4-12
Oakland 2-14


(6) Green Bay over (3) New Orleans
(5) Philadelphia over (4) Arizona

(1) NY Giants over (6) Green Bay
(5) Philadelphia over (2) Chicago

(5) Philadelphia over (1) NY Giants


(3) Indianapolis over (6) Houston
(4) New England over (5) Baltimore

(2) San Diego over (3) Indianapolis
(4) New England over (1) Pittsburgh

(2) San Diego over (4) New England

Super Bowl
Philadelphia over San Diego

That's right, we're picking Norv Turner and Andy Reid to each lead teams to the Super Bowl. Jeez, are we screwed.

Most jarring observations from the above:

  • Miami and Atlanta both regress, with the Dolphins seeing a more significant drop due to a tougher schedule loaded with colder outdoor games.
  • Denver dropping like a rock. Partly wishful thinking, but come on, Kyle Orton plus pouty crazypants Brandon Marshall can't offset a potentially promising running game
  • Tampa Bay, Oakland and Cleveland will be really, really bad.
  • Detroit's 2-14 will feel like 7-9
  • Brett Favre is a douche
Enjoy the season everyone.

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